How Perfectionism Impacts Women’s Well-Being and Self-Worth
You can’t avoid the myriad of motivational posts and reels online. According to them, it’s always time to grind and strive and make your mark. There can be a place for a version of this, but for many women, it’s a one-way ticket to perfectionism. All those filtered images, deep fakes, and doctored videos can leave them feeling inadequate. This will do a number on anyone’s well-being and self-worth.
The quest for the impossible — perfection — causes exhaustion, envy, low self-esteem, and a serious fear of failure. Unless and until women can embrace realistic, self-loving standards, they may get stuck in a cycle of critical self-talk and ever-increasing anxiety. There’s already enough pressure on women; no one needs to up the ante.
What Is Perfectionism?
Perfectionism is not an official diagnosis, but it’s associated with several disorders and conditions. It involves behaviors based on dysfunctional thought patterns. If you see the world via black-and-white thinking, you will probably judge your own actions without a gray area. You either performed perfectly or you failed.
Women often have impossible expectations heaped upon them. They, according to society, must be nurturing caretakers (mothers, cooks, etc.) and badass strivers while remaining youthful and fit (again, by mainstream standards). For centuries, females have had to do substantially more than males in order to gain respect. How can this not instill a skewed perception of self?
As a result, women may:
Judge themselves by externally imposed criterion
Have trouble accepting praise
Put in an immense amount of effort to put up a positive, successful front
Seek to over-control the circumstances of their life
Perceive all feedback as criticism
Refuse to try something new for fear they will look bad while learning
Needless to say, such signs and symptoms can be deeply detrimental to your mental and physical health.
Can Perfectionism Be Healthy?
It’s important to differentiate between ambition and perfectionism. Anyone who works toward self-improvement can do so in a healthy manner. This involves an acceptance that perfection does not exist and that their self-worth is not based on a fictional concept. Therefore, with guidance from a professional, you must implement changes in your thoughts, actions, and perspectives.
How Women Can Challenge Perfectionism
Acknowledge Life’s Unpredictability
People create online profiles and give false perceptions of success. It would behoove all of us to step away from our devices to remember what reality is. It requires flexibility in terms of expectations and our responses. Mistakes are inevitable and can often be valuable learning experiences. Reframing our day-to-day life can be our never-ending journey of growth.
Explore Attainable Standards and Goals
If perfectionism has been present in your life, it may take some time and patience to recalibrate. Take small steps to cultivate new expectations. Allow yourself to try something new and then build from there.
Celebrate Progress
The small victories are just as valuable as the big wins. When you practice celebrating any time you feel good about something, you’re rewiring your mind to shift its internal definition of “success.”
Combining these three concepts can empower you to replace perfection as a goal. It is always far more important to aim for experiences that are meaningful as opposed to trying in vain to please a culture steeped in competition, consumerism, and superficiality. If what you do enriches your life, that can be as close to perfection as any of us attain.
Women Addressing Perfectionism
It can feel daunting for a perfectionist to admit that they need help. Thankfully, women’s therapy is a private venture and the therapy room is a safe space. If your well-being and self-worth are being impacted by perfectionism, let’s connect and talk soon.
